EAT BUTTER, LOSE WEIGHT… and stop wasting time eating healthier foods, reducing caloric intake and increasing time spent exercising

We ate too many cookies and too much candy.  We drank and we feasted.  We came, we saw, we conquered.

The holidays are nearly over, and it’s now time to consider a resolution to lose weight and get in shape during the new calendar year.  Unfortunately, a number of folks are not content with simply eating healthier foods, reducing caloric intake and increasing time spent exercising.  Many instead turn to alternative or trendy dietary plans, either limiting their intake of carbohydrates or adopting the grapefruit diet, the cookie diet, the baby food diet or the three day diet.

Heck, some folks even consciously chose to follow the cabbage soup diet.  The prevailing wisdom is that the cabbage soup diet may contribute to rapid weight loss, even if it’s not going to help anyone get a little closer to that someone special.  Nobody has ever mistaken the cabbage soup diet for the perfume and cologne diet.

Forget the cabbage.  Forget the baby food.  Forget the cookies.  I just wish that somebody, somewhere, somehow would devise some sort of diet that would allow us to eat untold quantities of butter.  A stick of butter is already shaped like a candy bar, tastes better than a candy bar and weighs in at only 810 calories per stick.  This is precisely the type of food that should be the keystone of any serious dietary plan.

It just might be time to consider relocating to Norway, because many Norwegians appear to have embraced a new dietary plan that focuses on the consumption of butter and other fatty foods.  The fad appears to be sweeping the country at a somewhat alarming rate, and Reuters is now reporting that Norwegian sales of butter have dramatically increased – perhaps as much as 20 percent in October and 30 percent in November.   It is also reporting that Norwegians are paying around $13 for a 250 gram slab of butter, which is approximately 4 times the normal price.

The fad has become so popular that the country has literally depleted its stockpile of butter.  That’s right – there is almost no butter left in Norway, and dieters following the latest fad are finding themselves unable to secure the key to achieving their goals. … which means that it’s probably time to invest heavily in future sales of grapefruits, cookies, baby food and cabbage.

3 responses to “EAT BUTTER, LOSE WEIGHT… and stop wasting time eating healthier foods, reducing caloric intake and increasing time spent exercising

  1. chasemiddlesworth December 10, 2011 at 9:27 pm

    For starters i would really like to say, I really enjoy your writing style. It really keeps readers like me actually not only informed but entertained. You bring up very many different great points that really do seem obvious solutions if you think about it. You pose great points about what really is important if you want to lose weight, not some fancy overpaid diet plan from some famous actor, but actually working out and not thinking some diet will change everything. all and all i really think you do a great job in explaining that, thanks for your posts they are all entertaining and a pleasure to read.

  2. GAIL April 15, 2013 at 3:24 pm

    Why are u calling this a fad? People have eaten that way since the beginning of mankind. The junky, unnatural seed oils and margarines, which were invented in 1925, are the fads.

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