Tag Archives: breakfast

RUTHLESS RECIPES: an updated list of the top five worst fast food breakfasts

In 1973, McDonald’s first introduced its Egg McMuffin.  The sandwich consisted of an egg, a slice of ham and cheese served on a toasted english muffin.  The company later added a full slate of breakfast foods to its growing menu.  As early as 1987, the red-headed clown served nearly one-fourth of all breakfasts ordered from restaurants in the United States.

Now, over forty years later, Taco Bell is rolling out its new First Meal line of early-morning offerings and Wendy’s will soon be expanding its breakfast menu.  Other fast food chains are also beginning to place a similar emphasis on the market for breakfast.

Breakfast may be the most important meal of the day, but that doesn’t mean that the fast food chains are exclusively offering decent, healthy foods.  Shocker, eh?  Well, the following meals are particularly atrocious:

SUBWAY’S FOOTLONG MEGA BREAKFAST SANDWICHJared Fogle tipped the scales at 425 pounds, but lost over half of his weight by eating nothing but Subway sandwiches for a little less than a year.  The fast food chain capitalized on his weight loss by hiring him as a spokesman for the company, and Jared has now appeared in around twenty commercials touting the healthy benefits of Subway’s offerings.  You won’t hear him say a word about Subway’s Footlong Mega Breakfast Sandwich.  The freakish combination of eggs, bacon and sausage weighs in at 1,310 calories and contains 79 grams of fat, 31 grams of saturated fat, 550 milligrams of cholesterol and an absurd 3,190 milligrams of sodium.  It’s closely followed by the Footlong Sausage and Cheese Breakfast Sandwich, which lightens the load by around 100 calories and 370 milligrams of sodium.  Jared is ashamed.

MCDONALD’S BIG BREAKFAST WITH HOT CAKES.  Eating McDonald’s Big Breakfast with Hot Cakes will lead to a big belly, the need for big clothes and big risks to your health.  The offering is a dangerous combination of two pancakes, scrambled eggs and sausage… and a buttermilk biscuit… and hash browns.  The company has somehow managed to pack 1,090 calories into the meal, which fittingly compliments its 56 grams of fat, 19 grams of saturated fat, 575 milligrams of cholesterol and 2,150 milligrams of sodium.  Do yourself a favor and eat scrap metal instead – the hardware may not be as flavorful, but it should prove to be a much healthier alternative.

BURGER KING’S BK ULTIMATE BREAKFAST PLATTERBurger King‘s sales have been slipping.  It’s same-store sales are down nearly 4%, and analysts predict that it will now trail both McDonald’s and Wendy’s in gross sales.  It gets an “A” for effort, though, as its BK Ultimate Breakfast Platter somehow manages to dwarf McDonald’s Big Breakfast with Hotcakes.  The chain is almost inexplicably able to fill a plate with scrambled eggs, sausage, hash browns, a biscuit and three pancakes.   The resulting mess contains over 1300 calories, 72 grams of fat, 26 grams of saturated fat, 455 milligrams or cholesterol and 2,490 milligrams of sodium.  The chain was even thoughtful enough to include a bit of trans fat in the mix.

CINNABON’S CARAMEL PECANBON.   I feel a little guilty about including this entry, because any franchise that believes that Life Needs Frosting probably isn’t the mecca of health.   This is almost like shooting fish in a barrel, except that one of the fish is really a Caramel Pecanbon that somehow packs in nearly 1,000 calories and almost a full day’s worth of total fatOkay, I don’t feel guilty anymore.

HARDEE’S COUNTRY FRIED STEAK ‘N’ GRAVY BREAKFAST PLATTER.  Earlier this month, Hardee’s proudly announced that it would begin offering its Country Fried Steak ‘N’ Gravy Breakfast Platter, a four piece meal includes a breaded beefsteak smothered in sausage gravy, hash rounds, eggs and a buttermilk biscuit.  The combination isn’t quite as bad as it sounds, but still provides a hefty 660 calories, derives nearly three-fourths of its calories from 42 grams of fat and 13 grams of saturated fat and includes nearly a full day’s worth of sodium.  The company accurately describes the assemblage as a “stick-to-your-ribs breakfast staple,” that also  continues the franchise’s “fine tradition at breakfast.”  The second quote may be spot-on, but only if that tradition includes its Big Country Breakfast Platter with Bacon, Syrup, Jam and Butter and the gut bomb that it refers to as its Loaded Breakfast Burrito.

On a somewhat related note, yesterday was National Blueberry Pancake Day and tomorrow marks the celebration of National Croissant Day.  Read into that whatever you will…

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TACOS, BELLS, BEANS AND BREAKFAST: fast food chain proves that the early bird gets the… burrito?

Wake up, sleepyhead.  The alarm clock is screaming, which can only mean that it’s time to stumble out of bed, grab a pot of caffeine, throw on those clothes and head out into the great unknown.

Unfortunately, your stomach’s grumbling, your mouth is parched, and last night’s happy hour has devolved into this morning’s awful headache.  You need food.  Pronto.

The first few minutes of the morning can seem like a painstaking journey through purgatory, but eating at least some type of breakfast can ensure that the remainder of the day is a much more pleasant experience.  Breakfast is, after all, the most important meal because it ignites the metabolism, serves as an excellent source of sustained energy and allows us to operate with heightened efficiency throughout the morning and the remainder of the day.  It’s also critical component of a healthy diet, at least in part because eating breakfast leads to the production of enzymes that metabolize fat and help control weight.

Taco Bell agrees.  

That’s why the fast food chain plans to serve breakfast at around eight hundred locations. Find your keys and grab the antacids, pal – it’s time to make an early morning run to the border.

Unfortunately, these retail locations won’t be serving breakfast from the chain’s traditional menu.  For better or worse, the early birds will need to wait until later in the day to fuel their bodies with a thousand fun-filled calories of Volcano Nachos.  They’ll also have to pass the time before they can consume nearly a full day’s worth of sodium in the 980 calorie XXLGrilled Beef Stuft Burrito.  And, trust me, your co-workers, colleagues and the janitorial staff will be thankful that you didn’t start the day with a hearty helping of Pintos-n-Cheese or a handful of infamous Bean Burritos or Cheesy Bean and Rice Burritos.  Seriously.  

Instead, the chain plans to offer a new line of breakfast dishes under its “First Meal” moniker.  Customers will still be able to think outside the bun, except they’ll now be able to chose from breakfast burritos, hash browns, sausage and egg wraps, hot or iced coffee, and Cinnabon delights.  The food will still be cheap, with items ranging in price from a couple of quarters to around three bucks.  Not bad, and incredibly efficient, considering that customers will likely be getting somewhere around four hundred calories for every dollar spent.      

Still, the offering is sure to leave a few folks scratching their head.  The First Meal menu doesn’t come close to resembling anything that we’ve come to expect from the franchise.  It looks, almost inexplicably, like a slacker simply copied the breakfast menu from McDonald’s, Burger King or some other trans fat franchise.  The chihuahua is definitely disappointed. 

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